Thursday, March 14, 2013

St. Patrick's Day - You're Doing It Wrong.

St. Patrick's Day is a spectacular holiday because it is totally low key. You wear some green, drink some beer, pinch a few people, and maybe claim you're Irish in order to kiss inappropriate people. If you really want to step things up, you maybe paint your nails a minty color or throw on some glittery green sunglasses. In general, it is all good.

Unfortunately, we live in an age of evil overachievers out to make the rest of us look/feel bad. Just look at how people with too much time on their hands (or maybe not enough vodka?) are trying to turn St. Patrick's Day into the kind of holiday that requires effort:

How to make Shamrock Tortilla Chips for St. Patrick's Day seems to think I want to spend my time making green tortilla chips. NO.

st patricks day crafts lists this under (I kid you not) "Quick and Easy Last Minute St. Patrick's Day Crafts." Let me break this down for you: If you are building any kind of tree?? You are doing St. Patrick's Day wrong. teaches you how to make this wreath. This is not a wreath holiday, people! Just say NO and put away the foam loop. Step away from the ribbon.

I can't even deal with continuing to scroll through Pinterest looking at all of this, so let me just break it down and make it easy. If it involves a glue gun or turning on your stove, it is not appropriate for this holiday.

I have zero idea who these people are, but they are doing it right.


Anne said...

I'd rather turn on my stove and make Irish soda bread than "drink some beer, pinch a few people" to commemorate St. Patrick's Day. Of course, that's just me, but I'd rather be "wrong" in this case. Sorry!

The Dose of Reality said...

In my day you wore green or you got pinched...end of story! No wreaths, no crafts, no special nothing. I think the grown ups MAY have had some green beer, but that was considered REALLY going all out.

What even IS a last minute craft? That sentence does not compute! --Lisa

Crystal said...

I thought that about last minute crafts, too! I understand, say, last minute house cleaning, or last minute birthday gifts when you totally forget, even last minute hustle on a project to meet a deadline. But last minute crafts crack me up.

Madonna said...

some people seem to go all out. We basically just fix food and wear green :)

Mer said...

I agree! Making some Irish food and wearing green (as in a green shirt, not some beribboned mess I've hot gluegunned into existence) is my sort of celebration.